Sunday, January 08, 2006
I'm from Vermont and I piss where I want
It's another terrible day in the Grand Tetons. Sitting by the fire in a lodge at the base of Grand Targhee ski resort in western Wyoming after riding a foot of fresh snow all day I can't help thinking what a shitty time I'm having and how much I would prefer being at work.
After two winters in Louisiana, the third flattest state in the country, I've been a little starved for snowboarding. So when I saw a cat-skiing special at Grand Targhee, a mountain with a reputation for some of the best powder in the country, I jumped at it and invited some friends. For $300 bucks we got three nights ski-in-ski-out lodging, three days of boarding on the mountain and one day of backcountry boarding on a snow cat (the monstrous tracked vehicles that groom the slopes for my winter-averse readers).
The past three ridiculously hedonistic days have made me wonder if we survived the drive over - it's been nothing but deep powder, free booze and hot-tubbing. Yesterday was one of the most over-the-top days in memory. We hopped on the cat around 9 a.m. and spent the next three hours following guides who took us to untracked powder and great tree runs. And our guides definitely had their priorities straight. When I asked Dana, a mustached ski patrol veteran of 30 years, if I had time to pee, he said I could either pee or take a run. "There's plenty of trees where we're going," he said. "I always say, 'I'm from Vermont and I piss where I want.'"
After a coffee break and a hot lunch in a yurt, we headed out for three more hours of the same. At the end of the day the guides rolled out wine and cheese and, as my friend and I were the only people drinking red wine, we ended up splitting the bottle. When we got back to our room there was a phone message alerting us to a wine and cheese welcome reception in the lobby and who were we to refuse? Several glasses and a hot tub later we ambled over to dinner. We had brought a few bottles of wine with us so I asked the waiter about the corkage fee. "If you're nice, none," he said. So the six of us polished off another couple bottles and by the time dinner came the collective BAC of our table was about 5000. It made getting up for the first ride on the lift this morning unpleasant but it certainly made the night a fun blur.
Well, it's nearly my bedtime because it's still snowing and I've gotta get up early for another day of bottomless snow. Have fun at work tomorrow!
After two winters in Louisiana, the third flattest state in the country, I've been a little starved for snowboarding. So when I saw a cat-skiing special at Grand Targhee, a mountain with a reputation for some of the best powder in the country, I jumped at it and invited some friends. For $300 bucks we got three nights ski-in-ski-out lodging, three days of boarding on the mountain and one day of backcountry boarding on a snow cat (the monstrous tracked vehicles that groom the slopes for my winter-averse readers).
The past three ridiculously hedonistic days have made me wonder if we survived the drive over - it's been nothing but deep powder, free booze and hot-tubbing. Yesterday was one of the most over-the-top days in memory. We hopped on the cat around 9 a.m. and spent the next three hours following guides who took us to untracked powder and great tree runs. And our guides definitely had their priorities straight. When I asked Dana, a mustached ski patrol veteran of 30 years, if I had time to pee, he said I could either pee or take a run. "There's plenty of trees where we're going," he said. "I always say, 'I'm from Vermont and I piss where I want.'"
After a coffee break and a hot lunch in a yurt, we headed out for three more hours of the same. At the end of the day the guides rolled out wine and cheese and, as my friend and I were the only people drinking red wine, we ended up splitting the bottle. When we got back to our room there was a phone message alerting us to a wine and cheese welcome reception in the lobby and who were we to refuse? Several glasses and a hot tub later we ambled over to dinner. We had brought a few bottles of wine with us so I asked the waiter about the corkage fee. "If you're nice, none," he said. So the six of us polished off another couple bottles and by the time dinner came the collective BAC of our table was about 5000. It made getting up for the first ride on the lift this morning unpleasant but it certainly made the night a fun blur.
Well, it's nearly my bedtime because it's still snowing and I've gotta get up early for another day of bottomless snow. Have fun at work tomorrow!
Comments:
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I think Joe said it best.
We can't get a dusting here, and you're rolling in fresh powder.
You suck Druz.
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We can't get a dusting here, and you're rolling in fresh powder.
You suck Druz.
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